Care for Caregivers
It does not matter if you are a relative caring for a loved one or a healthcare professional tending the needs of a client—anyone taking care of a dementia patient will experience times of increased stress. The important thing is to recognize times of high stress and know how to deal with them appropriately. There are also preventative steps you can take to minimize stress and keep problems at bay.
Here are some key ways you can T.A.K.E C.A.R.E of yourself while caring for someone with dementia.
Talk with others.
Everyone needs an outlet to vent frustrations, express fears, or simply relate on common ground. Open up with others about what you are going through as a caregiver. You will be surprised to learn how many people have had similar experiences and you will undoubtedly find an abundance of moral support. Talk with family, friends, coworkers, and support groups to ease mental and emotional distress and to learn new ways of handling problems associated with dementia and/or care giving.
Ask for help.
Do not try to “go it alone” and do not expect others to know when you need assistance. Whether you are caring for one person at home or several residents in a facility, you will become overwhelmed, at times, with all of your responsibilities. Others close to you may not realize what is happening unless you specifically tell them. Call on family members, friends, church members, coworkers, etc. for help whenever you feel overburdened or depleted. They will be glad to lend a hand. If you do not have a close personal network of support, contact various agencies in your area to provide respite services, adult daycare, and various in-home services. Call or email us at the Armeda Foundation for added support and assistance.
Keep things handy.
Caring for a dementia patient means keeping up with lots of different things (supplies, medications, appointments, glasses and hearing aides, clothing, etc.). You can avoid stress and frustration by keeping certain items in specific locations that are easily accessible to you, but not necessarily the patient. Portable storage containers and weekly pill boxes help save time and energy when tending to personal care needs. You can also save time looking for misplaced personal items (glasses, hearing aides, false teeth, cane, etc.) by developing specific morning and bedtime routines. Always place items in the same secure drawer, cabinet, or container while not in use. Keep a small notebook and pen with you, too, and write down things to remember later.
Educate yourself.
Do not base your care giving techniques solely on the advice and actions of others, including medical personnel. Research Alzheimer’s disease and other forms of dementia on your own so that you can fully understand what is happening to the person you are caring for. Many caregivers do not realize how much their own lack of knowledge about dementia contributes to the stressful and chaotic behaviors associated with the condition. There are many books and organizations available to explain modern advances in Alzheimer’s research and how best to treat dementia patients. You can also refer to our “Informative Links” page for online learning.
Check your attitude.
It is only natural that you will have a bad day now and then—everyone does. Recognizing a bad day is important because you will have less tolerance for your patient’s behaviors and he or she will be sensitive to your mood. Tell someone you might need a break from rendering direct care. Perhaps you can find other tasks to perform until your mood improves (meal prep, laundry, housekeeping, stocking supplies, etc.). The last thing you want to do is exacerbate the patient or behave in a way you will later regret. If you find that you are having more bad days than good, consider that you might not be the best person to care for someone with dementia. It is a difficult and challenging job and no one should endure more stress than necessary. We all have different talents and temperaments and it is admirable when someone can identify and admit their limitations.
Accept what you cannot change.
No one wants to witness the effects of Alzheimer’s disease. Until a cure is found, it remains a cruel and progressive condition that deteriorates a person’s brain. It is not “mental illness.” You cannot “reason with” or “convince” an Alzheimer’s sufferer of reality by arguing logic. This only adds to levels of anxiety, frustration, and confusion. When dealing with Alzheimer’s disease, you will likely pass through phases of sadness, anger, denial, and feelings of helplessness. The greatest thing you can do for yourself—and the person afflicted—is to accept what is happening and realize that no one is to blame.
Rest and unwind.
Give yourself a break! On a daily basis, take a walk or find an activity to take your mind and body away from the immediate attention of care giving. A few minutes on break will alleviate stress and replenish you. Also, get a good night’s sleep. If the stress of caring for your loved one keeps you awake at night, seek help from your doctor. Getting adequate sleep will improve your coping skills, elevate your mood, reduce mental stress, and benefit your overall health. You also need to get out and enjoy yourself at least once a week. Make arrangements so that you can go out to dinner, a movie, shopping, etc. A weekend getaway or weeklong vacation might also be in order.
Enjoy care giving.
There is no greater gift than serving the needs of others and no one is more in need than a dementia patient. They are often scared and confused and unsure of what is happening to them. When you treat them with a smile, kindness, patience and understanding, you provide something they would not otherwise have—a sense of safety. When your patient feels safe, they will be more at ease and trusting of your care, thus making your job a little easier. You may even be surprised at how much there is to enjoy with your patient or loved one, especially if you both share a sense of humor.
Visit the following online locations for additional information to benefit caregivers:
